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Dede Wilsey knows very well that people love their children and families, especially their spouses. She plays on this quality of the well off people. She once zeroed in on Steven Read, a fellow museum trustee. She knew that the rich man could afford enough money. She proposed to him that he could give an outstanding gift to his loving mother by naming a particular space of the museum after her.  Read finally named the space after his children and lovely wife. Dede Wilsey is not one of those people who abhor asking for donation. It is this uninhibited desire that she has been able to raise millions of dollars for noble causes like refurbishing of Grace Cathedral and capital campaign for Immaculate Conception Academy.

Dede Wilsey is a Methodist but in case of charity, she is ecumenical. She and her rich husband have been donating generously towards welfare projects ranging from hospitals, educational setups and housing programmes. Dede Wilsey also championed the cause of animals. In this pursuit, she raised Prevention of Cruelty to Animals Society in the San Francisco Zoo. Similarly, she put in place the Boys and Girls Club of St. Helena for taking care of the animals in the zoo.